theatre critic
iPhoto caption: Image by Haley Sarfeld.
Every play is fantastic: A small-city theatre critic’s manifesto
My top priority as a critic will be to furnish every marketing team with as many easily quotable compliments as possible. I'll do this dutifully and without ambivalence.
We hired an AI theatre critic. Her breath is immaculate. She’s not once crammed a sandwich down her throat on the walk to the theatre, savouring the onions, the oil. She’s never been bloated, and she’s never, ever, been the monster to blame for a mid-play fart.