Sting, Coded Sides, and Cinnabon
I was totally looking forward to that foursome until everyone else showed up with golf clubs.
Evan Hansen, Audition Show Tunes, and Being Cool
So very cool that Drake wore that Breaker High hoodie to the Raptors game. This could finally be the big break that Ryan Gosling’s career needs to rescue him from relative obscurity and put him on the map again.
Break Ups, Callbacks, and Ryan Gosling
Posting memes of someone else’s quotes or ideas makes them yours as much as putting on a Jays shirt makes you Joe Carter.
Game of Thrones, Emojis, and City Planning
I’m no city planner, but is it necessary for every single street in Toronto to be under construction at the exact same time?
The Selfie, Giving Discounts, and Candy
Please God, if there absolutely has to be a game seven, let the power in all of Toronto go out at the beginning of the third period.
National Siblings Day, Cocaine Island, and Dating in Your Fifties
For National Siblings Day, my sister and I did what we do every year- nothing. You just can’t beat tradition.
Botox, Oasis, and Getting “Pinned”
I can’t stand hearing Oasis songs anymore. As catchy as they were, they all mean absolutely nothing but desperately sound like they want to. Oasis is the Duran Duran of the 90s.
Quitters, April Fool’s, and Theatre Passe Muraille’s History
It was World Theatre Day last Thursday, in case you missed it. In equally relevant world news, it was recycling day on my street last Tuesday, in case you missed it.
Dinner-Sized Salads, Murdoch Mysteries, and a Big Favour
I was gonna pitch a TV show about all the jobs I have booked this year, except there already is a show called One Day at a Time.
Hot Showers, Ryan Hollyman, and an Encounter on Christie Street
I was on hold for a Sleep Country Canada radio commercial but they didn’t hire me for the job so now I have roughly 637 and a half reasons to buy a mattress anywhere else.
Daylight Saving Time, Facebook Debates, and Ron Sexsmith Drops By
I am really feeling that hour I lost this week. Not because of Daylight Saving. But because I accidentally watched an entire episode of Riverdale.
Oscar Predictions, Dog Trainers, and Franco Boni
I tried to watch the first few episodes of Russian Doll but was distracted by myself constantly yelling at the TV, “It’s Groundhog Day! You’re being Groundhog Day-ed!!! How the fuck could you not have seen Groundhog Day???”
Italian Anger, the Leafs Rebuild, and a Whirlwind Romance
When Italian people are mad at you, it’s really hard to miss. You can see and hear them being mad at you.
Sunday Mornings, the New Ten-Dollar Bill, and Rocky Balboa
And maybe I wept because in movies things aren’t ever supposed to end. But, then again, Rocky was never just a movie to me.
Mister Rogers, Fatherhood, and Melted Cheese
Last week I read for three different detective roles in the same project: Detective Lotsadays, Detective Fewerdays, and Detective Prollyjustafuckinday.
Nose Piercing, a Stewardess Fight, and the Winter Smoking Blues
Monday- fuck this, smoke inside.