Lane Moore has a lot of jobs. She’s a bestselling author, frontwoman of the band It was Romance, stand-up comedian, and columnist. She’s made appearances on HBO’s Girls, written for the Onion, and been featured in the New York Times. Despite all the success Moore—like a lot of us—still struggles with the world of online dating. The New York based entertainer has managed to turn that struggle into a successful live show.
On March 8th Moore celebrates the fifth anniversary of Tinder Live. During the show Moore projects the dating app in front of an audience and together with the crowd—alongside some guest comedians—swipes along and chats with her matches. Previous guests have included the cast of Orange is the New Black and joining Moore for the anniversary show is stand-up legend Janeane Garofalo. Recently we had the chance to catch up with Moore to talk about her show, whether dating ever feels like acting, and all the mistakes people make when chatting online. You can read the conversation below.
Graham Isador: For people who aren’t familiar with Tinder Live can you walk them through what a typical show looks like?
Lane Moore: Tinder Live starts off with me going through my Tinder Shoutouts which are my recent convos, all-time favorite Tinder profiles, and anyone who deserves a mention. Then I bring out my panel of comedians/writers/musicians/actors, and we go on my Tinder Live [the dating app is projected on an overhead screen]. The audience votes who I swipe right or left on. Then I chat with my matches live in a way that’s super fun, funny, and weird. But also very, very, kind. Kindness is the most important thing to me on the show. I think that’s one of the reasons people love it so much. It’s not this bloodbath. It’s super silly and well intentioned. I came up with Tinder Live literally the second I first got on Tinder. It was day one for me. I just had a lightbulb moment of exactly what the show would be.
What’s the best experience you’ve had at the show? Has it ever lead to a date?
The point of the show isn’t for me to find dates. I make a point of only talking to the weirdest guys on Tinder. That said, I’ve had people in the audience encourage me to go out with guys who were on Tinder Live and were really good sports. Honestly they were the worst dates of my life. I should not have listened to those people.
Every single show people tell me: I laughed more than I have in years. My whole body hurts from laughing. And that’s absolutely the goal. I love hearing people are laughing more than they have in ages. That’s the best feeling. And I love hearing someone who just found out about the show talk about how kind it is while still being super funny.
I’ve never had much luck with Internet dating. Why do you think Tinder and dating apps have become the norm for people?
I think it’s the allure of MAYBE being that one in a million who has luck with it. Because people do! But I have not been one of those people either. Most people have a really hard time with it, which is where the show came from. It’s my catharsis as much as the audience’s.
That makes a lot of sense. So why do people seem to get it all so wrong?
I think it’s so complicated. But for one: I don’t think people put in that much effort. It can be like: “Hi! Hi how are you how are you? Cool good wanna get drinks?” and like I don’t even know you at all!
How much of dating is a performance? Do you think it has any similarities to being on stage/acting?
For me it’s not, I’m very much myself and have no clue how to be a watered down version of myself. I have no idea what “normal” first dates look like, but I’m sure they’re very coy and polite, and I’d rather just be excited and myself and have them do the same.
You’ve had a ton of success between Tinder Live and your book. What would you ideally like to do with your art? Where would you like this all to go?
So many things. I want to be a showrunner with my own TV shows, I want to tour the world with my band. We’re playing SXSW this year which is a dream. I’d love to be on Broadway. All of it. And eventually, I’d love a nap.