The Royal Wedding, Yanny/Laurel, and Doug Ford Action Movies
Nappoholics Anonymous is a weekly column featuring twelve random thoughts by actor Tony Nappo. Some are funny, some are poignant, some bother him, and some make him weep from sadness while others make him weep for joy. Here are his thoughts: unfiltered, uncensored, and only occasionally unsafe for work.
1. As much as I couldn’t really care less about the royal wedding, I was happy at the thought of all those asshole racist Brexit voters sitting in their local pubs crying in their beers as Meghan Markle became a Duchess.
2. I am not sure that the Canadian Society of Italian Undergarments entirely understood what was wrong with the initial name, but good on them for voting unanimously to change it to the “gender-non-specific partner beater” just in time for summer, anyway.
3. I wanted to wish this gang a happy third season for Kim’s Convenience but really I am posting this photo because I can’t stop staring at Ins Choi’s Burt Reynolds’ moustache.
4. If you ever see an audition breakdown looking for a “Tony Nappo type,” don’t go. It’s a metro police sting operation. Or possibly a mob hit. Just stay home and self-tape.
5. Tweet of the Week
6.
7. Top 5 Doug Ford action movies.
5- King Wrong
4- Slack Panther
3- Mad Tax: Beyond Comprehension Dome
2- First Bud
1- Lie Hard
8. Guest Post of the Week
9. I hate to encourage him but…
10. I don’t have anything against opera but I’m not a huge fan, either. Having said that, you would think with such a fancy pants, highfalutin audience, they’d at least spell the titles of the shows on their subway posters right!!!!
11. When humanity finally comes to an end, aliens from space sifting through the rubble will find that Yanny/Laurel thing and think, “Yeah, fuck ’em. They deserved it.”
12. Why don’t they just put the gun access/second amendment issue to a vote to anyone 18 and over? The NRA can’t possibly bribe that many people all at once, can they?
Tony Nappo
Tony is Italian, he’s from Scarborough, he’s an actor, he’s a father, he’s a really good house painter, and he doesn’t believe that most things matter, ultimately, at all.
LEARN MORE
Paintings, Pornos, and Broken Countries
Every single fucking time there is a mass shooting, we all give the speeches, and we all share the memes (to each other, who are all mostly already in agreement), but nothing changes.
Gottfried, Strays, and Easter Eggs
Dogs rarely have a hidden agenda when they meet people or other dogs: they're either wagging that shit or they aren’t.
Slapping People, ACTRA Meetings, and Dog Shit
At one point, I was sleeping with so many actresses that they used to just hold ACTRA meetings in my bedroom.
Birthdays, Cranes, and Judd Apatow
If the Freedom Convoy has answered one question for every Canadian, I think it's this: whatever happened to that dumb kid in my class?
Scorsese, Dentists, and Dying Alone
If waving a Fuck Trudeau flag is a legit way to get a meeting with him, I’m gonna start waving my Fuck Scorsese flag wherever I go and keep my fingers crossed.
Truckers, Porndle, and Bad Boys
In these newly woke times in the entertainment industry, it’s slightly amazing to me that nobody has protested the fact that Denzel Washington isn’t actually Scottish yet.
Paintings, Pornos, and Broken Countries
Every single fucking time there is a mass shooting, we all give the speeches, and we all share the memes (to each other, who are all mostly already in agreement), but nothing changes.
Gottfried, Strays, and Easter Eggs
Dogs rarely have a hidden agenda when they meet people or other dogs: they're either wagging that shit or they aren’t.
Slapping People, ACTRA Meetings, and Dog Shit
At one point, I was sleeping with so many actresses that they used to just hold ACTRA meetings in my bedroom.
Birthdays, Cranes, and Judd Apatow
If the Freedom Convoy has answered one question for every Canadian, I think it's this: whatever happened to that dumb kid in my class?
Scorsese, Dentists, and Dying Alone
If waving a Fuck Trudeau flag is a legit way to get a meeting with him, I’m gonna start waving my Fuck Scorsese flag wherever I go and keep my fingers crossed.
Truckers, Porndle, and Bad Boys
In these newly woke times in the entertainment industry, it’s slightly amazing to me that nobody has protested the fact that Denzel Washington isn’t actually Scottish yet.
Comments