Gun Control, the Olympics, and Turning Fifty
Nappoholics Anonymous is a weekly column featuring twelve random thoughts by actor Tony Nappo. Some are funny, some are poignant, some bother him, and some make him weep from sadness while others make him weep for joy. Here are his thoughts: unfiltered, uncensored, and only occasionally unsafe for work.
1. In the US, this year alone, there have been thirty-four mass shootings in fifty days. That’s a mass shooting almost every other day. Which means if you wait one full day out of respect for the victims’ families to reopen the debate on whether or not there should be stricter gun control laws, you would NEVER actually have the debate over whether or not there should be stricter gun control laws.
2. Guest Post of the Week
3. I decided to give up lent this year for alcohol and chocolate.
4. Team of the Week
If we could only send one team to the Olympics, this one would have my vote. Pure gold, every fucking time.
5. Watching Rocky IV with my dad on the weekend and I had one of those Prufrock epiphanies. I was never meant to be a Rocky. I’ve just been a Paulie-in-waiting from the very beginning.
6.
7. Top 5 Favourite NRA Pop Songs
5- Play With Firearms
4- You Shot Me All Night Long
3- G.L.O.C.K. In the USA
2- Where the Kids Have No Name
1- BulLet It Be
8. And the problem with that would be…?
9. That was no hoax. Stallone just kicked Death’s ass. He always comes back in the last round!!!
10. Classic Ella
11. Worked with Jameson Kraemer last week, a super talented actor and one of Toronto’s best-kept secrets.
Years ago, I remember bumping into him late at night at some chicken place at Bathurst and Bloor. I was either drunk or high. Probably both. I had seen him, not too long beforehand, in some Shakespeare thing in a park somewhere. I told him how much I had loved his work and asked how things were going for him. He said they were going well at times and frustrating at other times. I gave him the same advice that was given to me by the former president of the American Academy of Dramatic Arts, Hugh Nielsen, during my final interview with him in 1991. He said, “You’re a wonderful actor and you should be a star one day but, because you don’t have the traditional looks that most producers are looking for in a young actor, people aren’t going to know what to do with you for about twenty years. After that, you will work nonstop.” I asked him what the hell I was supposed to do for the next twenty years. He said to get as much work as I possibly could and continue to work on my craft every day so that when things finally did start happening for me, I’d be ready.
And that was one of the best pieces of advice I have ever been given… which I was happy to drunkenly pass along.
12. I’m turning fifty on Thursday. My sincere apologies to all of you who lost money taking THE UNDER.
Tony Nappo
Tony is Italian, he’s from Scarborough, he’s an actor, he’s a father, he’s a really good house painter, and he doesn’t believe that most things matter, ultimately, at all.
LEARN MORE
Paintings, Pornos, and Broken Countries
Every single fucking time there is a mass shooting, we all give the speeches, and we all share the memes (to each other, who are all mostly already in agreement), but nothing changes.
Gottfried, Strays, and Easter Eggs
Dogs rarely have a hidden agenda when they meet people or other dogs: they're either wagging that shit or they aren’t.
Slapping People, ACTRA Meetings, and Dog Shit
At one point, I was sleeping with so many actresses that they used to just hold ACTRA meetings in my bedroom.
Birthdays, Cranes, and Judd Apatow
If the Freedom Convoy has answered one question for every Canadian, I think it's this: whatever happened to that dumb kid in my class?
Scorsese, Dentists, and Dying Alone
If waving a Fuck Trudeau flag is a legit way to get a meeting with him, I’m gonna start waving my Fuck Scorsese flag wherever I go and keep my fingers crossed.
Truckers, Porndle, and Bad Boys
In these newly woke times in the entertainment industry, it’s slightly amazing to me that nobody has protested the fact that Denzel Washington isn’t actually Scottish yet.
Paintings, Pornos, and Broken Countries
Every single fucking time there is a mass shooting, we all give the speeches, and we all share the memes (to each other, who are all mostly already in agreement), but nothing changes.
Gottfried, Strays, and Easter Eggs
Dogs rarely have a hidden agenda when they meet people or other dogs: they're either wagging that shit or they aren’t.
Slapping People, ACTRA Meetings, and Dog Shit
At one point, I was sleeping with so many actresses that they used to just hold ACTRA meetings in my bedroom.
Birthdays, Cranes, and Judd Apatow
If the Freedom Convoy has answered one question for every Canadian, I think it's this: whatever happened to that dumb kid in my class?
Scorsese, Dentists, and Dying Alone
If waving a Fuck Trudeau flag is a legit way to get a meeting with him, I’m gonna start waving my Fuck Scorsese flag wherever I go and keep my fingers crossed.
Truckers, Porndle, and Bad Boys
In these newly woke times in the entertainment industry, it’s slightly amazing to me that nobody has protested the fact that Denzel Washington isn’t actually Scottish yet.
Comments